Lions vs. Packers

Let the excitement begin.

From Seattlepi.com:

"After a seemingly winnable two-game stretch against Detroit (2-11) and Minnesota (6-7) at home, the 5-8 Packers finish up with a trip to meet Chicago in a game that might be meaningless for the NFC-leading Bears. Mike McCarthy's team would need some additional help in the form of more losses than wins for other Wild Card hopefuls such as the Giants (7-6), Eagles (7-6), Falcons (7-6), and/or Panthers (6-7), but with an 8-8 mark and 7-5 record within the NFC, a Green Bay team that has been residing on the south side of .500 all season could, however implausibly, find itself in the postseason bracket."

If the Pack make the Playoffs, I will streak naked through the city wearing green and gold body paint.

In all seriousness, Brett Favre is a career 15-0 against Detroit and the Lions are one of the few teams worse off than Green Bay. A win today is more than plausible, it's expected.

First Quarter Update: Lions 3, Packers 3.
John Kitna's short left passes were not enough to get the Lions into the red zone, and Detroit was forced to kick a 42-yard field goal. Al Harris made an astounding pick and ran 34 yards before being pushed out of bounds. Favre hit David Martin square in the numbers in the end zone, but Marty couldn't hang on to the football. Rayner's kick is good, game tied at three. The Packers will start the second quarter with possession at the GB 48. When will the excitement end?!

Halftime Update: Lions 3, Packers 10.
Vernon Morency sneaks into the end zone on a 14-yard run for the first touchdown of the game. Brett Favre now holds the all-time NFL record for completions at 4,968: Bad Ass. Green Bay loses one of their most experience offensive linemen: Crappy. Kitna is 10/13 passing for 59 yards (19 rushing) with 1 interception while Favre is 15/25 for 144 yards and a touchdown.

Third Quarter Update: Lions 6, Packers 10.
Kitna can't really manage to get down the field, so the Lions settle for another field goal (42 yards). To make matters worse for Detroit, Charles Woodsen picks off Kitna, who then gets called for the 15-yard face mask penalty. I like your moves, Johnny. With that possession, Favre throws a pick to former Packer Paris Lenon in the end zone. The Lions will have the ball at the start of the fourth.

Game Recap: Lions 9, Packers 17.

John Kitna could not get anything done against the Green Bay defense. When Favre threw an interception from the endzone to the GB 12, I thought the Lions had a pretty decent chance of scoring. Could they possibly move the ball 12 yards?

"Actually, no," says the Lions quarterback. "We thought we should just try to push through 2 or 3 yards at a time until we could get within field goal range for Hanson. He's on my fantasy team."

Hey, that works, if you're looking to be replaced by Troy Smith next season. Kitna finished the game going 16/26 passing with zero touchdowns and 135 yards, bringing the Lions' record to 2-12.

On the other side of the ball, Brett Favre went 20/37 passing for 174 yards, becoming the new All-time completions leader. He was sacked once and threw three picks. Vernon Morency had a pretty good game, rushing 54 yards with two touchdowns. Defensive Tackle Cullen Jenkins mauled Kitna 3 times, Aaron Kampman sacked him twice and Corey Williams brought him down one other time. The Packers' D also intercepted 2 passes, helping bring their record to 6-8 (tied with the Vikes) in the dismal NFC North.

Packers vs. 49ers

Here are two teams that suck pretty much equally, having had similar 2006 seasons thus far. It looks like it's going to be a cold and wet no-fun zone at Monster Park today.

Coach McCarthy gets the pleasure of facing the team for which he was offensive coordinator last year, helping lead the 49ers to a sad, sad 4-12 record. Will the Packers see the same fate this year? Do they have another win left in them? Coach said this weekend that he did learn a few things from Mike Nolan while there, and he tries to incorporate some of those ideas in Green Bay. Collective sigh.

What's a p...p..pass rush?

Before this three-game losing streak, the Packers were sacking the crap out of quarterbacks and producing the kind of consistent pass rush that actually made a difference. They had 31 sacks through the first nine games, an average of roughly 3.5 per outing. During weeks 7 through 10, Green Bay won three of four games and clobbered four different quarterbacks seventeen times, including nemesis Brad Johnson.

That's a lot of grass in your face. One of Green Bay's goals for today is to force Alex Smith into quick-release mode before being pummeled to the ground. On the other hand, look for Brett to be sacked at least three times while his offensive line is called offside a dozen more.

Frank Gore Invented The Internets

With 1,217 rushing yards this season (an insane 5.5-yard-per-carry avg.), Gore is the #1 back in the NFC and is third in the NFL behind LaDainian Tomlinson, who has 1,324 coming into Sunday, and of course, Larry Johnson with 1,312 yards. Watch Green Bay's definition of a run defense try to stop Gore later this afternoon.


First Quarter Update: Packers 7, 49ers 3.

After a 72-yard run by Frank Gore, San Francisco had to settle for a 24-yard field goal. Green Bay answered with a 36-yard pass by Brett Favre to Ruvell Martin in the end zone. Gore then loses his league-leading 6th fumble of the season, heading into the second quarter.

Halftime Update: Packers 17, 49ers 6.

After recovering Gore's fumble, the Pack get just a field goal after 2 incompletes to Greg Jennings and Donald Driver. Alex Smith throws a bunch of incomplete passes then Favre hands off to Ahman Green for a 1-yard touchdown. Smith throws a few more incompletes and the 49ers settle for a 36-yard field goal. Favre was sacked with 11 seconds remaining in the half and the ball was recovered by Brandon Moore, but the clock ran out for some reason and everyone walked off the field.

Third Quarter Update: Packers 24, 49ers 13.

Smith finally started completing short passes, the important one being to Gore for his 6th TD of the year. But Nick Collins picks off Smith at the GB 26, then Favre fires a 68-yard pass to Driver at the SF 33 before DoubleD managed to avoid being tackled for 33 yards and a touchdown. Green Bay will have the ball at the start of the fourth.


Game Recap: Packers 30, 49ers 19

Brett Favre can still have fun out there.

He passed for 293 yards, leading the Packers in victory to snap a three-game losing streak while bringing their record to 5-8. Terrible. Just as awful as San Fran's present three game losing streak and 5-8 record.

Identical, if you will.

But if the Packers can make it past BJ, John Kitna and Rex Grossman, they can finish at dead even. I have a sneaking suspicion that sounds a lot easier than it's going to be for them.

Mike Nolan's suit was pretty snappy, but it wasn't enough to keep his shame from seeping out of the collar. Alex Smith was 12 of 29 for 201 yards and two picks, facing constant harassment. Vernon Davis turned a short pass into a late 52-yard touchdown, while Gore rushed for 130 yards with a TD, falling short of stopping the Cheese.

McCarthy Promises Change

McCarthy's team didn't look so good during their 38-10 loss to the Jets on Sunday. In fact, they looked like crap. At halftime, the Jets were up 31-0 and the Packers had allowed 340 yards and 22 first downs, after allowing 100 points in the previous 10 quarters.

McCarthy says changes will be made, but the 4-8 Pack don't have a lot of options. He has says he won't fire [defensive coordinator] Bob Sanders - at least not during the season, and won't make any drastic changes to the starting lineup or the coaching staff.

Then what, pray tell, do you plan to do, Coach McCarthy?

"We will be looking at opportunities. You have only so many options, and we are looking into them. I'm not trying to be naive. I'm not trying to skirt the issue here. But I'm also not getting pinned down in 'You said this,' Okay? So that's where we are right now. Trust me, the coaches know exactly how I feel [pissed] about their role in it and their responsibility to get this thing turned around."

Okaaaaay then.

In McCarthy's defense, Green Bay has by far the youngest team in the league, with 28 of the 53 players on the roster having two years of experience or less. Exactly where the Packers are at isn't pretty. They have lost three straight games and haven't even come close to being competitive in two of them. That sucking sound can be heard equally as loud on offense as on defense.

In other Green Bay News: Former Notre Dame quarterback Carlyle Holiday was claimed by the Packers off waivers Tuesday from the Arizona Cardinals. The 6-foot-2, 217-pound Holiday replaced wide receiver Chris Francies, who was released the same day. Holiday played four games with the Cardinals this season and made two starts, catching zero passes. So, the outlook is sunny for him as well.

Jets-Packers: Game Wrap-Up

Jets 38 - Packers 10

Green Bay's defense was completely disemboweled by Chad Pennington, who went 25 of 35 for 263 yards and two touchdowns. His two picks were lost among three touchdown drives of 70+ yards in the second quarter alone.

Cruising on a 31-0 halftime lead, Pennington and company found it easy to produce yards and confuse the young Green Bay defense with occasional no-huddle offense, connecting with eight different receivers.

Jerricho Cotchery led the Jets in receiving with 99 yards and a touchdown with Chris Baker adding fifty and a score. Cedric Houston rushed for 105 yards with two touchdowns and Leon Washington contributed forty with his second TD of the year.

Brett Favre managed to complete 24 passes for 214 yards with 1 touchdown pass and two picks. Noah Herron led the Pack in receiving with a whopping 51 yards, while DoubleD produced forty-one with a touchdown. Ahman Green had yet another 100+ yard rushing game to no avail and to add to the constant suffering, David Rayner missed a field goal.

The Jets improve to 7-5 on the year while the Packers fall to 4-8.

The Packers head to San Fran to take on the 5-7 49ers for what could be their fifth win of the season. Or possibly their ninth loss, while Ingle Martin inches ever closer to his dream.

Fans booed the Packers several times throughout the game, but loudest as they jogged to the tunnel at halftime. Mike McCarthy sees why:

"I'd be booing too. Shoot, they should boo us. I've got no problem with that. This is a man's league, a man's business and a man's game."

Jets-Packers: First Half Update

NY Jets 31 - Green Bay 0

THIRTY-ONE TO ZERO.

The Packers have been shutout twice in Brett Favre's illustrious career. Both have come during this season. How hard is it to get into field goal position? Pretty difficult when you've turned the ball over twice and never even stepped foot into the red zone.

After 97 total Packers yards to New York's 340 and six first downs to the Jets' 22, something has got to happen. A field goal, perhaps? That would be swell.

UPDATE: Yep, you guessed it. A field goal! The Jets now lead the Pack 31-3 with just over seven minutes remaining in the 3rd quarter. It's all I've ever dreamed of.

UPDATE #2: Favre hits Driver in the end zone, Jets 31-Packers 10. McCarthy throws his flag and gets the call on a defensive reach-around.

UPDATE #3: Pennington hands off to Washington for a 20-yard touchdown run. Jets 38-Packers 10 with 11:35 left to play.

Do You Take Drugs, Danny?

Everyday.

Are you ready for some Packers football? Well, you’re really not until you shove a brat in your mouth and down a pint of Milwaukee’s Best, or twelve. After many tested hypotheses, I’ve found this season - and every one since around ‘98 - more entertaining and much easier to discuss after I’ve consumed mass amounts of alcohol.

On that note, let’s take an intimate look at Green Bay’s season up until this point.

Week 13 is upon us and the Packers stink like sauerkraut. After a 1-3 preseason, they’ve managed to muster a win against two division rivals: the 5-6 Vikes and the 2-9 Lions. Impressive, I know. Generally speaking, in a division such as the NFC North, a crappy record doesn’t necessarily mean you’re not going to the playoffs. Enter the 9-2 Chicago Bears.

The Pack started their season with high hopes. After all the retirement rumors at the end of last season and speculation throughout the entire off season, legendary starting QB Brett Favre returned for "what could possibly be his last first game ever". They were shut out 26-0 by the Bears in broad daylight.

Then the Saints came marching into Lambeau, coming off a vagabond year, all fired up about a guy named Reggie. Piss-pounding ensued and the Packers found themselves at 0-2.

They held on tightly to a shred of dignity and beat the Lions on the road before two straight losses to Philly and St. Louis. Whispers of Favre’s possible retirement slithered out of the Primetime woodwork while prayers for a less painful season could be heard in taverns throughout Wisconsin. Maybe a bye week was all they needed to regroup?

It seemed so, as they took down (ex-nemesis) Dante Culpepper and the Dolphins before putting the beat down on Leinart and the Cardinals. Holy crap, two in a row! Suddenly, they had a 3-4 record and the future didn't seem so dim. Next thing you know, they're in Buffalo, being held to one touchdown and a field goal for their fifth loss of the season.

The Pack then hopped across the river to Minnesota, where Fred Smoot runs wild with a broad on each arm, insisting he looks fabulous in purple. Or maybe that was Prince. Regardless, there were no water-recreation related shenanigans that weekend, unless you count the spanking that went down at the Metrodome, a 23-17 Vikings loss. Confidence rebuilding, now!

The Patriots arrived at what is normally a frozen tundra two weeks ago and shutout the Packers 35-0 before they were creamed by the recently refreshed Shaun Alexander and trigger-happy Hasselbeck on the national Monday night stage, in "what could possibly be Brett Favre’s last Monday night football appearance of his career". Pshh.

The Packers are now 4-7 with five games remaining, looking forward to a home game against the 6-5 Jets where they will strive to not play like the JV team we’ve been watching all year. Any playoff hopes flew out the window long ago, so all that can really be done at this point to save face is win out the season.

I've got my eye on you, McCarthy.